Rather than talk about our day to day, I thought I'd write down some goals I've been working on.
Remember last month when I wouldn't stop talking about The Happiness Project? Well, I'm still talking about it, contemplating it, etc. One of the things Rubin said that really resonated with me was that if you do a small amount of something each day, big things happen. I guess it's a worldly way of saying by small and simple things great things come to pass. In short one of my goals is to DO A LITTLE BIT EACH DAY, stop worrying about biting off the big chunks and take small steps.
Another one of my goals that I've been working on since the beginning of the year was to FOCUS ON MY RELATIONSHIP WITH HEAVENLY FATHER. My prayers are becoming more personal, my scripture reading is not great but I do it daily, even if I'm not quite sure what to focus on, but mostly I've been listening to talks and devotionals on the Mormon Channel app. It's very uplifting.
Next up, SPEND 15 UNINTERRUPTED MOMENTS WITH EACH CHILD. Usually this happens at bed. This is where I let them take over and chose exactly how they want to spend their time with me, unscheduled, no expectations on my part. I know it may seem trivial but it's hard to get one on one time with them, especially with our busy schedules and how we are usually all together. Paige usually spends her fifteen minutes cuddling against my chest with her blankie wrapped around both of us while I sing (after each song ends she asks "again") while Hannah usually spends her 15 minuets as she spends every other waking moment of the day. Talking.
Finally, I want to spend more time EXPRESSING JOY AND APPRECIATION. This is not necessarily expressing GRATITUDE which I also hope to accomplish, but I find so often I admire someones ability to express themselves, or wear a cute outfit, or maybe they say something that I really take to heart. Rather than internalize it I want to go to those people who inspire and astound me and let them know that I notice. I've been noticing a lot of negativity around me and I think it's just the way of the world. Especially on Facebook. I see posts that begin with "Not to sound ungrateful but..." Then they go on to sound ungrateful. I will try to be a better example to my daughters in this respect.
Just a note, I had a thought today in church that I've been pondering all day long. We had a lesson on our divine nature and our divine potential. I thought about how one of Satan's biggest lies he tells is the one where he tries to convince us otherwise, that we are unworthy of our divine inheritance. I think this occurs especially in mothers because I see it a lot in my friends and especially in myself. I realized today that if MY DAUGHTERS had the same thoughts about themselves that I often have, I would be heartbroken and devastated. Partly because I love them desperately, but also, because I know they have such a potential for greatness (and not necessarily worldly greatness although I'm sure Hannah and Paige have the capabilities for any ambition they set their hearts on). I love my daughters and I know Heavenly Father loves me and I know I need to be kinder to myself.
That's it. Just trying a little harder to be a little better as President Hinckley always encouraged us to do. Side note: I am driving to Utah with the girls tomorrow for a week long trip. It will be good to be back in Zion ;)