{Take my Hand}

Tonight my heart is heavy and emotions run high. A dear friend of ours has just informed us of some tragic news.

Our friend has been having some pregnancy complications. She is about 22 weeks along with her baby boy and she got some very serious news about the condition of her baby.

After a few days of wondering what could be going on she called tonight to tell us what was going on. It seems in her last ultrasound they discovered that this little body that is other wise growing perfectly normally and healthily is only developing one half of his brain and the other half of his scull is simply filling with fluid. When discussing what this means for her baby it turns out that the quality of life will be very poor and basically he will have to live in a special bed if he does live at all.

She said all she needs right now are prayers. I have sent her a message telling her that we will pray for her and her little one, and I also told her that in our church Adam holds the priesthood which means that he can give a special blessing for the sick and other wise afflicted. Adam said he would give her a blessing if that is what she desires.

My heart reaches out from one mother to another. I don't even know what to pray for...I pray for comfort, I pray for her health, and I just pray that he will be able to fulfill his purpose on this earth to whatever capacity that might entail. I also thank God for the health of my little one. As I think about the little baby I believe as a mother you would almost want your child to be missing a limb or even hearing or sight if only to experience some aspect of this life.

I'm grateful for the knowledge I have of Jesus Christ and his atonement and that families are eternal. I'm grateful for my faith in his infinite wisdom because I cannot understand why this is happening to my friend but I know that there is a plan and that Heavenly Father is with their family.

This picture of Christ and a little boy by Greg Olsen is titled "Take My Hand" and I think that we all need to reach out and take the Savior by the hand so that we may be led through the darkness of things that we cannot understand into his perfect light and love.

{Baby Blue Eyes}

When Adam and I would talk about the little baby growing inside we never even considered the possibility of any eye color other than brown/hazel. In fact, Adam often lamented that she would have "plain old boring brown eyes." I like my brown eyes so it didn't matter to me if Hannah had brown eyes too.

When she was born she had navy blue eyes just like every other baby. We just kept waiting for them to change and after about three months of waiting we began to hope that she would be blessed with beautiful blue eyes.

Not very many people on either side of the family has blue eyes. I'm glad that my Hannah can share the recessive trait with a few special people. My Granpa Alan has blue eyes along with my Grandma Phyllis (Dad's dad; Mom's mom) and then her Uncle Sean has blue eyes. Her Uncle Addison has blue eye...(one is green) and so Hannah is with a good group of people.

When Hannah was born and they handed her to me, staring into her beautiful eyes was the most joyful reward after nine months of waiting. She looked at me calmly, serenely. She was very alert for the first two hours after birth (until she decided it was time to sleep) and kept looking around the room with those big eyes. Now it has been six months since I looked into those eyes for the first time. Every day those blue eyes search wildly trying to drink in every new experience. Her blue eyes make her unique but it is the curiosity behind those big blue eyes that make me love them.

A Gift From Adam

Some of you may have noticed that I have been posting book reviews. "Oh," you may say, "Melissa is getting into reading." After all, I've incorporated a gadget on my sidebar tracking the books that I am currently reading, and books I have completed this year. So far in the month of January I have completed 3 books and I'm on to another.

This is not a new development. I love reading. It has always been a passion of mine and in recent years I have been unable to read as much as I've wanted to. I have found some good series and read some fantastic books in the last three years but I haven't been able to do read as I have wanted. The audio book is something I have enjoyed (especially after I got honked at for reading New Moon at red lights) and has helped me to continue to listen to good literature (once at Wells Fargo I spent three days with my Ipod in my ear with my hair covering the earbud and the wire taped to the back of my neck).

When we moved we had no proper book case for our home and for the past several months my precious books have been hidden in boxes revisited only occasionally. A few weeks ago Adam decided to go out and buy a book case for our little friends so they could come out and play. Thanks to Adam I have a beautiful book case which sits at the top of our stairs. I'm afraid that I will fall down the stairs one of these days because I keep looking back at how great it looks.

I asked Adam for a favor as well. I asked him if he would buy me a book every month with his own ushering money so that we can continue to increase our library. He agreed (although this month he ended up buying 11 books for him, Hannah, and me).

Book Review: The Glass Castle

“When dad wasn't telling us about all the amazing things he had already done, he was telling us about the wondrous things he was going to do. Like build the Glass Castle. . . All we had to do was find gold, Dad said, and we were on the verge of that. Once he finished the Prospector and we struck it rich, he'd start work on our Glass Castle." Pg 25

I just finished reading the memoir The Glass Castle by Jeanette Walls. I decided this book would be a good "cabin book" that my aunts would enjoy passing out to the cousins and telling them if they would read it, they would appreciate their charmed lives a little more. At times I didn't know if I was enjoying it or just trying to make it through the book. All I know is that this is a true Cinderella story.

The story describes the childhood of Jeanette Walls. It begins as she is leaving her Park Avenue apartment in a town car. As she drives to a lavish party she passes a homeless woman in the street and immediately realizes to her horror that it is her mother. Ashamed, she hides and rushes back home. Then unfolds the story of her childhood as her family wanders from city to city each time her father promises that it is only a matter of time before they strike it rich and together they will build the Glass Castle and live in the lap of luxury.

As the story progresses Jeanette sees how the world views her and her family, her rose-colored glasses come off. After years of roaming around the desert Southwest, the family eventually moves to their father's family home in Welch, West Virginia.

She suffers sexual abuse from her childhood neighbor (she reacts by trying to shoot him at the age of 8) her uncle (her mother reacts feeling sorry for the uncle and says that molestation is a crime of perception) and her brother is the target of their grandmothers sexual abuse.

She adores her alcoholic father but recognizes that he is no good for the family. At 12 years old she urges her mother to leave him so that they can get welfare and be able to eat (at one point they are eating a stick of butter mixed with sugar). The New York Times review says that in the fairy tales there is often a loving parent and a sadistic evil parent but in this book the father and mother each take turns playing dual rolls.

It is a profound book. One that will have you laughing and rolling your eyes in one moment and cringing or crying the next.

It has a happy ending obviously. Jeanette and each of her siblings gradually escape to New York. The children are brilliant and self reliant, taking care of each other and each succeeding in their own capacity.

I like that the book was written in a matter of fact tone. Walls never seems like she is saying "woe is me" and seems to still love her parents in spite of their gross flaws.

I recommend this book to anyone who thinks they "had it rough" growing up, or anyone who needs to have a humbling experience.